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The Siem Reap, Cambodia-bound tourist bus, AKA the “Scam Bus”: Cheap and, well, maybe not so cheap. Prices at the moment start at around 300 baht for a ticket to Siem Reap, Cambodia, home to Angkor Wat and a few hundred other old temples. This seems like a cheap option for a lot of tourists but for many this 300 baht ends up as only a fraction of what you ultimately pay and the service, in respect to time and treatment (you are definitely not seen as human, but as a stupid piece of cargo to be ripped off as much as possible), is absolutely horrid.

There are several ways this ticket is subsidized: First, you will be massively overcharge for your visa, with overcharges ranging anywhere from 200 to 600 baht ($5-$15). Second, kickbacks from the several restaurants you’ll stop at along the way. Third, upon entering Cambodia you will be pressured into changing money, significants amounts of it, and at ridiculous rates. And fourth, you will be sold to a Siem Reap guesthouse for $7, and that’s their money, not yours. To facilitate getting you into the guesthouse, what is normally an eight to ten-hour journey and easily completed by mid-afternoon, will be dragged out to fourteen to eighteen hours, resulting in arrival times on average of 10 pm to 2 am.

Now imagine arriving at 2 in the morning? How likely are you to move to another guesthouse at this hour? At you can probably forget about that nice shining bus they showed you in the picture, for the Cambodia leg of the trip you’ll be lucky if it’s even a bus, let alone one with working A/C.

VIP Scam

Thailand must be one of the easiest countries in Asia to travel around. Domestic flights reach about two dozen provinces all in about an hour, an excellent train service connects Bangkok with Chiang Mai in the north, Nong Khai and Ubon Ratchathani in the northeast, and to Surat Thani and to the Malaysian border and beyond in the south. And finally, there are government-contracted buses that reach literally every last corner of the country departing from three major bus terminals in Bangkok.

Still, travel agencies on Khao San Road (and Sukhumvit and elsewhere) do a brisk business selling tickets on private “VIP” (very impressionable passengers, very inferior product, etc) buses and minibuses to the more popular destinations such as Chiang Mai, Surat Thani (with boat connections to Samui and Pha-Ngan), Siem Reap in Cambodia, and more. And reports of problems with the Khao San Road-based transport are all too common events.

All of these operators are selling you tickets on unlicensed and therefore non-existent bus services which will allow you very little recourse in the event of a problem.

The southern route (Surat Thani/Pha-Ngan/Samui): You’re off to Koh Pha-Ngan and the Full Moon Party. A big “VIP” bus is parked at the end of Khao San Road for all of you to board. You arrive ten hours later to be transferred to the ferry to the island. Upon arrival you are pushed off the bus for transport to the ferry, rush! rush!, rush! Before you can even get oriented and wipe the sleep from your eyes, the bus is gone and you’re left standing with your bags – which might feel a little bit lighter now. Wait, didn’t I have a camera in there? Where’s my iPod? Where’s my money belt? While you were sleeping, you were robbed. The incidents of theft on this route are legion. They happen every week and regular readers or travel discussion forums such as the Lonely Planet Thorntree read reports of theft on this route with alarming regularity. Usually it’s a matter of someone rifling through the bags stowed in the luggage hold, though there have been cases where sleeping passengers were relieved of their valuables as well. If you’re heading south, get yourself to the Southern Bus Terminal in Pinklao (on the opposite side of the river and not all that far from Khao San Road, really) and buy a ticket to wherever it is ou want to go. Robberies of this nature are almost unheard of on government buses and the service is better.

The northern route (Chiang Mai): Not as bad as the southern route or the Cambodia route, but still a crappy way to travel. Stuffed into a minibus, you and fifteen other similarly-minded tourists with similarly oversized backpacks are Chiang Mai bound. Mountains, villages, trekking await. But while you will make it to Chiang Mai, the minibus won’t be dropping you off at some convenient location near Tha Phae Gate. That cheap price you paid (I have heard reports for bus tickets as low as 50 baht) is subsidized by Chiang Mai guesthouses and trekking agencies all of which do a marvelous job picking at your carcasses, yes, I know you’re still alive but in their vulturous eyes you are dead meat and they’re having a feast. You’ll be forced into one of these guesthouses because the van never actually makes it to Chiang Mai, but stops well outside of the city forcing you to go with these touts. So whether you know it or not, when you buy your bus ticket you also buy your guesthouse and trek at the same time. So much for shopping around and exploring your options, huh? Are you aware that there are dozens of comfortable public buses departing every evening from Morchit Bus Terminal that will deposit you at dawn at Chiang Mai’s Arcade bus station leaving you the option of sorting out where you want to stay and who you want to trek with? Do you question the quality of a guesthouse or trekking agency that has to resort to subsidizing transport to locate customers?

Thailand has an excellent inter-provincial public bus system. Use it. And if you don’t, you might also want to ask yourself why is it that no Thais use these Khao San VIP buses? Could it be they know something the rest of us don’t know?